Tuesday, July 27, 2010

He did it!

My amazing husband passed his real estate exams (on the first try no less) and is now licensed to be Realtor!  He is working for Smith Preferred Properties.  It is a great company that works hard to give everyone a quality and preferred type property for their money.  I am very proud of him and his efforts and we are very hopeful that this new career venture will provide us with some answers for our hopes and prayers.  If anyone is in need of real estate help in buying or selling a home, please think of Eldon and pass on his name to your family and friends in Arizona.  Thanks!

Families are like brownies...mostly sweet but full of nuts!

The only other titled that would be fitting for this post would be....you might be a redneck if....   Truly, that was the theme for the family fun that happened during this years 24th of July Celebration.  We had an absolute blast!  It was a weekend full of family, laughter, pranks, and crazy inventions.  We had every member of the family there except for a dearly missed brother Derrick and nephew JT.   So on to the redneck jokes. 

You might be a red neck if...
Your family rides around in garbage cans, or you park the family vehicles (garbage cans) on the front lawn.  Either way, both happened this weekend.  Eldon's oldest brother Nolan owns the garbage company in Snowflake and a good chunk of Eastern AZ.  Every year he is in the parade and the last few years, he has created a garbage can train, and lets our nieces and nephews ride in them in the parade.  All the kiddos absolutely love it and have an absolute blast!  After the parade, the garbage train was parked on the front lawn :).

You might be a redneck if....
that same garbage train tips over during the parade with your nieces and nephews inside...better yet, it tips over right into a pile of horse manure. Poor Jade was involved in the accident, but she showed how tough she was while showing off her boo boo

You might be a redneck if....
If your brother rides around in a mobile garbage can like he is oscar the grouch.   Ha Ha, again for the parade, Nolan and his boys created a monster garbage can by putting the motor of a four-wheeler onto a garbage can.  It is pretty funny to see move around, and it can even pop wheelies!  It was definitely entertaining.

You might be a redneck if....
If your son is also your great nephew, (long story, but true) and if you teach them young to ride a dirt bike.  Dax had fun getting rides on everything from the 4-wheeler, to the dirt bike.  Being on these vehicles is perfect for this little guy as he was beyond mobile since he learned to walk.  He is quick!

You might be a redneck if....
your father creates a monster bike for two!  Its Alive! j/k.  But RH really did create this tandum bike.  He welded 2 bikes together into one like a tricycle.  It is an interesting bike to ride, but is good exercise, and is good for a laugh.

You might be a redneck if....

Horse rides are given right out of your front yard :)  Our nieces rode in the parade on their horses for their school 4-H programs.  After the parade, the horses were hanging out just like the rest of the family at Mom and Dad Larson's house, so ponyrides were definitely a must during the day.  Sadie had a lot of fun!

You might be redneck if....
you create a swimming pool out of a garbage dumpster.  Seriously!   Nolan and his boys, once again were very creative and took a roll-off dumpster, made it water tight, filled it with water, and all the kiddos had a blast swimming in it!  The best part was seeing all the people's faces as they drove past.  Im sure they must have been wondering what in the world the kids were doing playing in the dumpster.   We joked that it definitely gave a whole new meaning to dumpster diving :P 

If you couldnt tell, everyone had an amazing time.  The Larson Family always is a joy to be around, especially when everyone gets together.  We really did miss Derrick and JT and wished they could have been there!  While we had the majority of the crew up there, we took some family photos.  We intend to photo shop our missing family members in for future pictures.   This is a picture of all the grandchildren except for Dax, who was napping and JT, who wasnt able to come up and our 3 little angels.  It is amazing how every single one of the grandchildren is so dang good looking!!
I think it is because of these two find people.  They are the ones who started it all, and made such a joyous family. 
 



And this is a picture of all the children and their spouses.  We are again missing Derrick, but we left a spot for him right up front.  Entire group pictures are coming soon, but I didnt get any with my camera.






And just because she is so dang cute and it sums up the feeling of the weekend.  Here is Payten enjoying her day with cotton candy and family.  :)  Happy Pioneer Day!

Saturday, May 1, 2010

Its about Love

I am sorry that i have been a slacker in blogging.  I just didnt want to overload my blog with unhappy posts and while we truly are greatly blessed, it has been hard for me not to focus on the sad things.  This post does have a little bit of sad, but also some hope and a request for help.  First off, after several months of waiting, we finally got the headstone for our little boys.  They finally have their resting place marked so all can know they were here and now they have the proper place to put flowers, so now the gardner cant steal mine!  We are really pleased how it came out, and we are very glad that their plot is no longer just a mound of dirt!   Since losing our twins, my optimism for having a family has really decreased significantly, but our desires have only gotten stronger.  Unfortunately we have already suffered another miscarriage since our boys, which only brings more dismay.  So while we will forever try to get our own little ones here, we are turning to adoption to assist us with our desires to have a family until we are blessed to have our own.  We are looking into adoption with the State of Arizona.  This course began in March when we almost had the opportunity to get a cute little 6 week old girl through some friends.  The birth father ended up stepping in, so, now we wait to see if he changes his mind and decides to let us have her or to see what else Heavenly Father has in store for us.  All the websites I have read, have stated that many adoptions come through personal contacts, so I am reaching out to our family and friends.  If you know of a little one who is need of a good home, or have any recommendations or connections for adoption, we would really appreciate your help.  I know that we will be able to have a family someday.  Heavenly Father has promised both Eldon and I in our patriachal blessings the blessing of raising a family, but we may need help in getting our family here.  We ask that you continue to keep us in your prayers that we might be guided by our Father in Heaven and be able to know his will for us and to follow it, and if adoption is his plan, that we might be led to the little one/s that are meant to join our family.  We appreciate all the love and support we have recieved in our recent trials and heartaches and hope that future posts can be filled with more happy news.

Thursday, April 1, 2010

Happy Birthday Eldon!!!

To the most amazing man in the world (and the hottest too), Eldon, I hope you have a wonderful birthday.  I know you are not looking forward to growing older, and while I am hating how fast times flies too, I absolutely love that if I have to grow old, I get to do it with you!!  I am sorry this birthday really hasnt been anything special, but hopefully you will have a better birthday weekend, then your actual birthday! I am so very in love with you!  I am beyond grateful for the blessing you are in my life.  You truly are the most amazing man ever and I dont know how i got to be so lucky to have you as my eternal companion, but i will forever be grateful that you chose me to spend your life with.  I love you baby!!!  Happy Birthday Sweetheart!

Sunday, January 24, 2010

Forever in our Hearts

It is with very heavy hearts and tear filled eyes that we introduce to you, our precious little twin boys, Ethan Dere and Tommy Mons. They were born still on December 3, 2009 at 24 and 1/2 weeks.

Ethan Dere Larson & Tommy Mons Larson

I hope you will understand that although this is an incredibly difficult post to write, I need to show the world my sweet little boys. I need you to understand if possible how much I love them and how much I miss them, and how important it is to me that their existence is recognized and not forgotten. I apologize if this post is difficult to read, I understand.... it is difficult to write. But these boys are my babies and it is important to me to preserve these memories and to never forget.

Obviously from previous posts, the entire pregnancy was anything but easy or typical. There were complications from the very start, but we were certain things were going to work out in the end. To our utter devastation, we were wrong and the absolute worst thing imaginable happened, we lost our beloved little boys to an identical twin disorder known as twin to twin transfusion syndrome. For those of you who are unfamiliar with this, it is a connection between the babies in which one baby takes the nutrients of the other. We were not able to find this out until after the death of our little ones. The entire pregnancy we believed the boys were fraternal twins, but tests showed they were identical twins that split very early in the pregnancy giving the appearance of fraternal twins. They had two sacs but shared one placenta, which is very very rare. Because the boys were so far along, a normal delivery was needed rather than just a surgery, so we went through the traumatic process of delivering our babies knowing we would not be bringing them home. The boys were born 3 hours apart after 16 hours of labor. Ethan was born first just before 11am weighing just over half a pound and measuring a mere 9 inches in length. Tommy was born just before 2pm weighing only 2.3 ounces and measuring only 6 inches. Tommy was the first baby we lost at 21 weeks and because of such was much smaller than his brother. Once they were here, we were able to spend 2 beautiful days holding them and spending time with them. Even though their spirits were already gone, I cherished the time I could hold them and rock them and feel like their mother.

And then we began the hideous task of preparing for their burial. We were beyond blessed in this trial with the generosity of others. Eldon's work, Stone Creek Furniture made a beautiful wooden casket as a gift for the boys. It was absolutely perfect and nicer than anything we could have purchased. My work generously paid for the burial. Our sisters Michele and Angela purchased Ken Doll Tuxedos for the boys to wear... They looked so cute even though the doll clothes were still too big!

Eldon's mom and my mom worked together to line the casket and Eldon's mom made beautiful baby blankets for both boys. Many others helped by helping us get flowers, create the programs, and find the perfect songs and poems to make the day very special. The funeral service was very sweet and although I cried through the entire thing, I know it was the most sweet and beautiful service we could provide for our precious little sons.


I honestly can say that this experience is the absolute most difficult thing that has ever been required of me. I have never felt so much sadness or pain as I have losing my babies. I am trying to find a way to heal, but it is a very long road that I imagine will take my entire life. One thing I can say, is that despite being taken through utter despair, I was not left to endure this trail alone. Even still 6 weeks later, we are being shown the Lord truly does love us, and so do many others. We have been absolutely amazed and grateful for the abundance of love and charity that has been shown to us during this difficult time. Even and especially small things such as a hug or a quick note have meant the most and really do make the burden a bit lighter to bare. I am especially grateful for the nurses at Banner Desert Hospital and for their kindness. Their thoughtfulness allowed me to have mementos such as molds of my babies hands and feet and pictures of foot prints as well as many many pictures that I will treasure forever. And to everyone else who called, emailed, text, visited, brought meals, prayed and even thought about us during this difficult time....Thank you. I am still overwhelmed by everything and probably still in denial and am just trying to find the strength to acknowledge the reality of the situation and that I am not going to wake up from this nightmare, so I have not really been ready to taken the steps that I long to, to appropriately express my gratitude, but please know that it means so much, especially now to be loved and thought of and we truly have felt it and are grateful. We are also so very grateful during all of this for the gift of the restored gospel. I simply cannot imagine trying to go through this without the knowledge that Eldon and I have an a marriage that is sealed for time and all eternity. Our family is eternal and I will forever dream of the day when we will be reunited with our precious little boys and we can be a family that is whole once again.

Also, I just want to add from the safety shield of a computer that it is ok to not know what to say, unfortunately there isnt anything that can be said or done to bring my babies back. However, "Im sorry", "I love you", "I m thinking of you" or even just a silent hug means a great deal. My biggest fear is that my babies will be forgotten or it will seem as though they never existed. I need them to be remembered, I need to be able to talk about them, even if it makes me cry, I need to feel like their mother, so please bare with me while I start my journey of healing and be patient with me while I grieve.

Thursday, December 3, 2009

Unfortunately, we have lost our other little boy. We thank you all for your prayers and support. We really do feel loved and cared for.

Tuesday, November 10, 2009

We Just wanted to let everyone know that we lost one of our boys yesterday. We are coping with the loss, and are still very optimistic for our other little boy's future. We will keep everyone posted on how our little fighter is doing. We are so thankful for all of the prayers and support- they really do help.

Sunday, November 8, 2009

Just like that

the roller coaster ride that we stepped on 5 months ago just took a dive right into a dark tunnel. We cannot see whether the next turn has a light at the end of the tunnel or a giant brick wall to slam into. 2 weeks ago, i went in for my monthly ultrasound. It was supposed to be really exciting, i was supposed to be able to figure out the flavor of the other little peanut inside me. Instead we were given some very heart wrenching news. My babies are very very small....scary small. The doctors think there is an issue with the placentas that prevents enough blood getting through to the babies. In short, my babies are starving and not growing like they should. The doctors also added that if we don't do anything, we will lose both babies!!!! So after being completely devastated, we decided along with my doctor that the answer was obviously to not "do nothing".

So my whole world is upside down for the moment just trying to get these little ones to stay with me. I am now on oxygen 24/7 which i have to say is incredibly not fun! Fortunately, they make portable oxygen tanks, so for now, i am still able to work with the portable tanks. The oxygen helps to enrich the blood that is getting to the babies. I have to take blood thinner, which is in hopes that thinner blood will be able to penetrate the placenta wall better and get more nutrients to the babies. I also have to sit in a luke warm hot tub for one hour everyday (rain or shine) to help promote better circulation. Thank goodness my big brother has a hot tub with a temperature control or i would have already been admitted to the hospital for the duration of my pregnancy. I also am on a eat eat eat diet. Which is fun, but will not be fun when i am trying to lose the baby weight later. But for now, the desserts and soda (yep doctors orders to drink soda :)) are a nice change. I also have to have appointments 2 times per week to monitor the little ones and make sure they are still fighting with me.

One baby is about 3 weeks behind and the other baby is about 2 weeks behind. Both are in jeopardy, but obviously one is doing better than another. we are very hopeful that all of these new remedies will help my little peanuts grow bigger and be able to at least make it to survive, and even better thrive. A few good things did come from this big mess (other than the desserts and soda) was that we had to do an amnio test to determine if the babies were chromosomally normal or if there were additional problem to deal with. thankfully from the test thus far (we are still waiting for the final complete results, we only have a partial) from the partial results, the babies are chromosomally normal. We also were able to determine from this test, that our little ones are both BOYS!!!

So if we can get these little babies to continue fighting like their parents are, we will have two cute and adorable little boys to cause trouble and mischief. All i want is those little trouble makers! So we are asking our friends and family to join us in this fight and if you dont mind to add our little boys to your prayers. We need all the help and faith we can get to make it through this and bring these wonderful little babies into our family and our home.

Saturday, October 17, 2009

Its a Boy....and A Surprise!



We were so excited to go to my ultrasound and find out the flavors of our little peanuts. Well.... It didn't quite turn out like i would have liked. We did discover however, that our kids are already being difficult :) I am kidding.... well kind of. My parents say its just payback already, but we had one baby that would not hold still so the tech had to beat my stomach to make it stay still. We barely were able to see that it was a rambunctious little boy! And the other baby was being difficult and hiding behind my belly button. Apparently ultrasounds cannot travel through air, and there is an air pocket behind the belly button which the picture cannot travel through. We had the technician and the doctor try to make the baby move out from behind my belly button, but no luck. So just to torture their mom.... I will have to wait another 3 weeks to find out what we are having with our other child. Fortunately, i am posting this late, and will know in about 10 days...if they cooperate this time. Because one baby was hiding and was was a wiggle worm, We didn't get any good pictures either. The only good one was this one where can see both babies together. I really like the twin pics. I think it is fun to see them both together. We are very excited to be expecting a little boy. Eldon really wanted to have a little boy, so we know we at least got one, so he is pretty happy about that. We are hoping the other baby is a little girl so we can have the best of both worlds, but we will be happy with 2 little boys as well! I just want to know! As for me, sorry I don't have a belly picture to post. I just haven't taken one, but i will update soon. My belly is definitely sticking out. My co-workers make fun that all of a sudden, I just popped out and am very apparently pregnant and getting bigger each week, and that i already have the pregnancy waddle. Well, to my defense, i am glad to look preggo, much better than just looking like i am getting fat! And the waddle is only at the end of the day, when i am tired from working all day and my muscles under my tummy are tired. Life has been a lot easier for me lately. Still not a fairytale by any means, but the morning sickness is finally under control for the most part, and i have been back to work for over a month, so that is definitely positive. I am very tired each day, so my bedtime has been moved to before nine...lame I know, but oh well. I am starting to feel movement, so that is really fun and been the best part of this pregnancy so far. We are really excited and glad that everyone is healthy and things are going good, and we are just waiting for the next ultrasound so the planning can really begin!

Tuesday, September 1, 2009

bedrest already

this is more for journaling and personal purposes, so sorry if this is boring, but last week and yesterday were two of the scariest days ever. Last week I started bleeding, not much, but enough to make it a very rough and scary night since I wasn't able to get a hold of the doctor. All I could think about all night was losing one of my babies or both. It is amazing to me how important these little ones are to me already. i have only been pregnant for 3 months and only known about having 2 for about 6 weeks, but the idea of not having two is one of the worst thoughts i can imagine! We are still adjusting to the idea of instant family of four but now all our planning revolves around 2, not 1! Thankfully, the doctor was able to see me the next morning and we were able to do an ultrasound, and again thankfully, my little ones were doing just fine, and had grown quite a bit. The bleeding was caused by the placenta coming away from the uterus lining, which is still not a good thing. the connection provides blood to the baby, so it is pretty important, but the nurse said the baby could lose up to a quarter of its blood supply and still be ok, so the amount of blood that i was losing was not enough to harm the baby. however, it was important that the blood stop, so i was put on strict bed rest for a week until the bleeding stopped. I was beyond bored! but thankfully my dad and my little brother was able to come and help me out so that i was able to stay off my feet. They also kept me from going insane by myself. so the bleeding stopped, so i went back to work on Monday. the day was rough, but went fine, but last night i started bleeding again and this time it was worse, so again, I was sitting here fretting about the potential of losing one of my precious little ones. I had another ultrasound and this time went to a special imaging place, so i was able to see better pictures of the little ones. Thankfully again, everything is just fine, as far as the doctors can tell, the babies are perfectly healthy and growing on schedule. The ultrasound also didn't give any reason for the bleeding, which is good and bad. There doesn't seem to be anything to be concerned about, but yet, still blood, so we will see what happens, but my biggest concern is that both babies are doing good. Baby A was very cooperative and Baby B was very stubborn, so apparently I am going to have a difficult one. Which fact I am totally fine with if I can just get them both here safely and healthy. so here are some fun pictures from today's ultrasound. It was really neat, the clinician showed me the 2 halves of each babies brain, the 4 chambers of the hearts, 4 arms, 4 legs, and 2 healthy cords doing what they are supposed to. I was 5 days too early for the doctor to tell me the sex, which is really frustrating!!! So close to not having to wonder anymore!

so here is both babies looking at the tops of their heads.

here is baby A, and it was sucking its thumb (sorry dont know gender and I have had too many guesses that keep changing so I am not going to guess yet). Since Baby A was being so cooperative, we got a great 3-D Picture.

it looks like the baby thought it was too bright, even though there wasnt any light. Maybe it was just sleepy and rubbing its eyes :)

This is Baby B, upside down. Its legs were crossed which was super cute to see!

Sunday, August 30, 2009

Can it be, already 3!

This is going to be a quick post, and is about 2 weeks late, but I wanted to write it. Eldon and I have now been married for 3 whole years. I cant believe that 3 years ago, we were dying for the day to come when we would be together. The time has absolutely flown by! And now our world is completely different. we have come a very long way in 3 years.... Married, moved 3 times, bought a house, bought 2 new cars, got a dog, changed jobs I can even count how many times, and are expecting 2 little miracles in a few months! Crazy Crazy! I just wanted to tell Eldon how much I love him. I am so grateful that he chose me to be his eternal companion. I truly am the luckiest girl ever! It has been such a happy 3 years! We have definitely had our highs and lows, but I have never been happier in my life and it is all because of the amazing man that I married. Happy late anniversary honey! I love you with all my heart!

Friday, July 31, 2009

Joining the Club and then some

We are thoroughly pleased to announce that we are finally joining the club..... The mommy and daddy club! It has been a long road (many have longer but still) of more than a year of hoping and trying with 2 failed pregnancies, but we are finally pregnant! I am about 7 weeks along (which is still a bit early, but we are just too excited to keep the good news to ourselves!) This little bundle definitely took some work so we are hoping the work will pay off and everything will go smooth.


We also just had our first ultrasound. We were really excited for an opportunity to hear the baby's heart beat. Unfortunately, it was a little too soft to hear, however, we did get an even better treat. The doctor started the ultrasound and immediate stated a very interesting little tidbit..... Can you tell from the pics (sorry they are blurry, its hard to have a picture of a picture)



If you know anything about ultrasounds early on in pregnancy, you know that this early, the baby is very small and its pretty difficult to distinguish anything, but you can see the yolk sac which is the black hole looking egg in the picture. The interesting little tidbit was that there happens to be 2 little black hole looking eggs which means.....WE ARE HAVING TWINS!!!

Definitely a shocker for us! We were absolutely not expecting that little surprise and are still pretty much in shock, but absolutely elated for this little roller coaster ride we stepped on to. We are very hopeful that everything will be safe and smooth for our little ones to join our family! They are due to arrive sometime around the end of March....like the 22nd or so, but twins usually arrive early, so I am guessing late Feb, early March, but we will see when they feel like having a birthday. :) Because there are two sacs, it means they are fraternal (not identical) twins. so who knows what the flavor will be. Eldon and I have both had many dreams about twins and they typically involve and boy and a girl, so that is my guess, but we will see what Heavenly Father has in store.

So since there are two, I have pictures of each, but its really hard to make out. Hopefully we will have better ones to post in the future when they are bigger than a little dot on the screen!

So here is Baby A.

and here is baby B.

Everything looks good so far and my blood work and hormones are right on target. Although we couldnt hear the heart beats, we were able to see them flickering on the screen. I am doing ok. I already definitely feel a difference in my tummy (but its probably in my head). I have been fairly nauseous, but havent been sick yet. Mostly, I am absolutely exhausted and just focus on keeping my eyes open at work. So if we go a bit in between posts...thats why! But with the exciting news, i will try to keep the blog updated on events. And just for posterity, even though I dont like the picture (So bare with me) This is the belly shot at 6 weeks. I was already chubby before, but have now added a few pounds and have a swollen abdomen.


Friday, July 3, 2009

we have been busy

And I have been a slacker!!! Sorry! Its really hard to have the desire to hop on the computer when you are on it all day long at work! And the weekends have been full of trips, family, and fun little projects. Usually, when I take a while to blog something, I cheat and just back date it. Well, I am just meshing all our recent adventures into one giant blog, so sorry if this is really long (and it is really long).... like I said, we have been busy!

Going back to May.....

As a quick update, Eldon's family names their cars. Not sure why exactly why, but they do, so we thought we would follow tradition. It took a little bit to come up with the name but then we found the perfect one! The Black Pearl!! :D

If you know me, then you know that Pirates of the Caribbean is like my all time favorite movie... All of them. And it just fit so nicely. It is black, its a treasure (pearl) and like Jack Sparrow, I have been after the pearl for a very long time!

Ok, now to the events

Our sweet little niece Olivia had her Honor Choir concert. She did an amazing job and even though I may be prejudice, she was by far the prettiest girl up there.


My Grandfather (my Dad's Dad) passed away.

It was very sad, but (and i know it sounds morbid) a little happy. My Grandpa had been sick for quite a while and was really suffering from Alzheimer's to the point where he learned his beloved wife had passed away several times a day as if it were the first time he had heard it. Can you imagine your heart breaking with the worst news ever multiple times a day. He also physically was to the point of being dependant on others for pretty much everything. My grandpa was too proud to ever want to live like that, and he missed my grandma dearly, so for that sake, it was time and i am glad he is reunited with the love of his life. We went to California for the funeral. It was really hard, but got even harder when I saw my uncles and my Dad and how hard it was on them. My Grandpa was a great man, and I love him very much. He will be greatly missed!


On a happier note, a week after the funeral, we made a trip up to Snowflake to see our 2 Nieces graduate from 8th grade.

In Snowflake, Jr. High graduation is almost as big of a deal as the high school, so we wanted to be there. The weather was kinda crazy that weekend. While we were driving up it was raining like crazy but the Black Pearl (my X-terra) made it through like champ.... Eldon's driving helped too. :P The graduation ceremony was awesome, my nieces looked beautiful and all was good....until we got a terrible phone call.... well i guess it could have been worse, but still not fun. Hollis (Eldon's brother) and his family were also on their way up to the graduation, but their vehicle lost control in the bad rain storm, hydroplaned and spun right into a guardrail, broke through it, and drove down the cliff into the ravine.


You can see from the pictures it was a scary drop!! Thankfully everyone was OK... A few bumps, bruises and frightened kids, but no permanent damage! The car was totalled completely, but everyone was OK!

Once everyone finally made it safely to Snowflake, the family fun began. Nothing special, just good times together. The kids always love jumping on the trampoline

and the newest form of entertainment is a dual bike that Eldon's dad built from 2 separate bikes.

He is pretty freakin talented! It was pretty fun to ride.

That same weekend (it was Memorial Day weekend so we had a 3 day weekend that we turned into 4 for the graduation) we went camping with my family.

We got to break in our new tent,(not pictured) and see how Zeus did in the wild. I definitely think he enjoyed it....He was very dirty and not my white clean little pup anymore.
The X-terra did great as well! I am still really loving it!

at the end of the May (yes all that above was in the month of May) was the Brett and Angela's twins (Payten and our angel baby Zoe) birthday. It is definitely a bitter sweet day! We had a blast celebrating with Payten. She was super cute, loved her cake and her gifts and she especially loved Zeus! She just wanted to hug and squeeze him all night. Then we went to the graveyard to remember and send our love to Zoe. It was really cute, we let Payten send the first balloon and told to her give it to Zoe and she walked right over to her grave and let the balloon go. She was trying to put it on the ground, and was a little sad when the balloon floated off, but she knew that when we spoke of Zoe, that is where she is. I think the picture of all the balloons looks really cool and really shows all the love we have for our angel baby and how much she is missed!



PS....doesnt Zeus look funny. He just chills and is content to be held.