We Just wanted to let everyone know that we lost one of our boys yesterday. We are coping with the loss, and are still very optimistic for our other little boy's future. We will keep everyone posted on how our little fighter is doing. We are so thankful for all of the prayers and support- they really do help.

Just like that

the roller coaster ride that we stepped on 5 months ago just took a dive right into a dark tunnel. We cannot see whether the next turn has a light at the end of the tunnel or a giant brick wall to slam into. 2 weeks ago, i went in for my monthly ultrasound. It was supposed to be really exciting, i was supposed to be able to figure out the flavor of the other little peanut inside me. Instead we were given some very heart wrenching news. My babies are very very small....scary small. The doctors think there is an issue with the placentas that prevents enough blood getting through to the babies. In short, my babies are starving and not growing like they should. The doctors also added that if we don't do anything, we will lose both babies!!!! So after being completely devastated, we decided along with my doctor that the answer was obviously to not "do nothing".

So my whole world is upside down for the moment just trying to get these little ones to stay with me. I am now on oxygen 24/7 which i have to say is incredibly not fun! Fortunately, they make portable oxygen tanks, so for now, i am still able to work with the portable tanks. The oxygen helps to enrich the blood that is getting to the babies. I have to take blood thinner, which is in hopes that thinner blood will be able to penetrate the placenta wall better and get more nutrients to the babies. I also have to sit in a luke warm hot tub for one hour everyday (rain or shine) to help promote better circulation. Thank goodness my big brother has a hot tub with a temperature control or i would have already been admitted to the hospital for the duration of my pregnancy. I also am on a eat eat eat diet. Which is fun, but will not be fun when i am trying to lose the baby weight later. But for now, the desserts and soda (yep doctors orders to drink soda :)) are a nice change. I also have to have appointments 2 times per week to monitor the little ones and make sure they are still fighting with me.

One baby is about 3 weeks behind and the other baby is about 2 weeks behind. Both are in jeopardy, but obviously one is doing better than another. we are very hopeful that all of these new remedies will help my little peanuts grow bigger and be able to at least make it to survive, and even better thrive. A few good things did come from this big mess (other than the desserts and soda) was that we had to do an amnio test to determine if the babies were chromosomally normal or if there were additional problem to deal with. thankfully from the test thus far (we are still waiting for the final complete results, we only have a partial) from the partial results, the babies are chromosomally normal. We also were able to determine from this test, that our little ones are both BOYS!!!

So if we can get these little babies to continue fighting like their parents are, we will have two cute and adorable little boys to cause trouble and mischief. All i want is those little trouble makers! So we are asking our friends and family to join us in this fight and if you dont mind to add our little boys to your prayers. We need all the help and faith we can get to make it through this and bring these wonderful little babies into our family and our home.